So, Matthew Kressel, the pride of Massapequa, has decided to grace us with his thoughts on "Reality-Breaking Cosmic Stakes." Because, you know, when you're from a place that seems to have a direct line to the national news every few weeks, it only makes sense to ponder the universe's grandest mysteries, right? Forget about the local gossip or the latest donut shop opening; let's dive into the cosmic!

I can only imagine the riveting conversations he must have had growing up—“Did you hear about the UFO sighting near the pizza place?” Truly, that’s a tale worthy of intergalactic storytelling. Can’t wait to hear how he plans to save the universe one Massapequa at a time